A New Challenge

It's very hard to start a challenge to get physically back into shape.  It's also not easy going.  In fact it can be downright embarrassing and hard.

Some of what I have learned is that I am not who I once was.  I am a former gymnast who before I went to college couldn't put on a single pound and stayed at around 115lbs.

In College things changed and I gained weight so fast that I didn't even realize it happened.  The fact was it didn't effect me as I could still do the same tumbling and could still do all my fun flexibility tricks.

It wasn't until I started working for a few years and had already started tae kwon do that I really noticed how out of shape I had gotten.  Instead of me getting better I still couldn't lose weight but I had more stamina and was stronger.  I even got some of my flexibility back which was very encouraging.

Then the worst damage happened I was practicing and went for kne of my favourite kicks the turning kick that was high enough to kick someone much taller in the head.  I tore out my meniscus.  I was very depressed for a long time after doing that as I was just starting to get more active again and was pushing to lose weight.  It was devastating and didn't know where to turn.

Recovery is never as easy as what you hope.  I healed fast but then lasting pain and weakness still lasts to this day.  Now I have had another surgery on the knee but since my first one it never has felt right.

I am getting healthier and it is taking time and I have learned to live with not having the same mobility or abilities that I once did.  It has taken a lot of time and practice of other skills to feel that while I can't be the same I can strive to be a better me.